Frustration Is Other People

Before I launch into this tirade, a quick progress report: Ben says the plumbers are about two-thirds done with the plumbing, and will start on the heating system tomorrow. As I understand it, we are getting (or now have?) some special type of water heater that continuously circulates hot water throughout the house, rather than storing the hot water in a tank. It's fancy stuff. I think it means you don't have to wait for your water to heat up after you turn on the tap. It might also provide other benefits, but someone else would have to explain them to you.

Now onto the rant. There are actually two frustrating things going on with the house right now. First is a situation with our FHA inspector, BJ, who -- to be honest -- has not been on my good side since Day 1. Apparently Ben and Sam have been trying to contact BJ to set up our first draw inspection -- a requirement of our loan, if Ben wants to get paid for any of the work he's done or any of the materials he's bought so far. However, BJ hasn't been returning e-mails or phone calls all week, with no indication as to why. No voicemail recording explaining his absence, no email auto-reply. This is clearly no way to run a business.

So Ben called our bank contact, Patty, to apprise her of the situation, as we need to get a draw inspection done soon. Patty contacted another inspector to do our inspection, and also put out a call to BJ. Lo and behold, BJ miraculously reappeared, returning Patty's call immediately. According to BJ, he's just been on vacation, and doesn't understand why we went and tattled on him. So now BJ's all bent out of shape because we went to the bank; hopefully, this will not somehow affect his inspection.

Now, it's certainly understandable that a man would want to go on vacation every once in a while. But to disappear with no warning and not tell anyone why you're gone and when you'll be back? Not cool.

I mentioned that I haven't like BJ from Day 1. I'll give you the short version of that story: He's SEXIST.

Here's the longer version: BJ showed up to do an inspection before we closed on the house (another loan requirement). And even though Sam and I were very clearly introduced as co-buyers, BJ only saw fit to talk to Sam. From the get go. Before he could possibly have had any indication that Sam was the go-to person for this conversation (which he was not, in any case). In fact, BJ wouldn't even look at me the whole time he was there, except when he had questions about the kitchen. And then he'd turn to me to find out if I was going to have a dishwasher in MY kitchen, or to find out what kind of stove I wanted. Because the kitchen is the only place a woman's opinion matters, right? Man, I've never wanted to shove someone's head in an oven so badly....

I definitely was not imagining things, as Sam and his parents noticed this dynamic as well. I was especially frustrated, as I had already gone through this experience twice before. At Homestreet Bank, our loan officer addressed all his comments and questions to Sam, even though I was sitting right there as well. And our pest inspector acted the same way for most of the time he was there, though he did start talking to me eventually (maybe for the last 10 minutes of his visit).

Okay, now on to Frustration Number Two. This one has to do with Seattle Public Utilities, and with being expected to pay for services not requested nor delivered.

Sam and I got our first water bill in the mail the other day, and were shocked to see that we owed about $160, even though we don't even live in the house yet. We looked over the charges, and saw that over $100 of the bill was for solid waste service on two 32-gallon trash bins. Wait a minute, we thought, we haven't been getting any trash service, and we don't have a trash can, much less two of them.

So yesterday I called up Seattle Public Utilities, who issued the bill, to protest the charges. This is basically how the conversation went:

Me: Why are we being charged for trash service when we're not getting trash service and don't even have trash cans?
SPU: You're a new homeowner? Your trash service automatically starts when you close on the house. If you don't want to be charged for the trash service, you have to call to cancel it.
Me: How was I supposed to know that? I didn't even know we were signed up for trash service since we don't have any trash cans.
SPU: We would've told you about this when you called to turn on the water.
Me: But I never called to turn on the water.
SPU: Yes you did. We have it in our records that Cynthia called to turn on the water back in July.
Me: I did nothing of the sort.
(Rustling paper.)
SPU: Oh, you're right, it was someone named Sharon who works for Wells Fargo.
Me: Okay, so I'll ask you again. How was I supposed to know to call and cancel service on our non-existent trash cans?
SPU: The person who started your water service should've told you.
Me: But we didn't deal with Wells Fargo. Wells Fargo worked for the seller, not us.
SPU: Well Sharon should've told you.
Me: But she didn't. So why do I have to pay for this service when we didn't order it and didn't even know about it?
SPU: Because your trash service starts automatically when you close on the house and call to start up the water.
Me: Again, how was I supposed to know this?

This circular conversation went on for a while, until we eventually got on a different track....

Me: Also, why am I getting charged for two trash cans?
SPU: You don't want service on two trash cans?
Me: No, I don't even want service on one. We don't live there yet.
SPU: It's because the previous tenants had two trash cans.
Me: Well, even when we move I don't want two.
SPU: Okay, then figure out which of your current trash cans you don't want, and we'll come pick it up.
Me: I already told you that we don't have any trash cans.
SPU: You don't have ANY?
Me: That is correct. We don't have any trash cans on our property, nor have there been any on our property since before we closed on the house.
SPU: So you want to order some trash cans?
Me: Eventually, yes, when we move, we'll need a trash can.
SPU: And you want us to deliver two 32-gallon trash cans?
Me: No. I said we want just one trash can.
SPU: Then just decide which one of your two trash cans you don't want so we can take the other one away.

This circular conversation also went on for a while before I was finally transferred to the guy's supervisor.

Supervisor: I understand you have two 60-gallon trash cans and only want service on one?
Me: No! We currently have zero trash cans. We want one. A normal sized trash can. 32 gallons. But right now I'm more concerned about the fact that you're asking us to pay for a service we haven't been receiving and had no way of knowing we were signed up for.
Supervisor: There's nothing we can do.

There was obviously more to the conversation with the supervisor, but you get the general idea. When I reported this all to Sam, he said I wasn't being forceful enough, and would probably have gotten better results had I gone completely ape shit on them. I told Sam he was welcome to try.

So today, Sam called up SPU to try to sort out the situation. However, he was told that SPU couldn't talk to him about the account since it was under my name. Which, of course, raises some questions: If SPU can't even talk to Sam about my account, how was some person named Sharon -- whom I don't even know -- able to set up an account in name? How was she able to promise on my behalf that I would pay for SPU's services? And if she was clever enough to get all that done, WHY THE FUCK COULDN'T SHE PICK UP THE PHONE AND TELL ME THAT I NEEDED TO CANCEL MY GARBAGE SERVICE?

So anyways, Sam and I need to call in to SPU together so that I can give them the okay to talk to him. Sam says they're now a public company, and can therefore be reported to the Better Business Bureau. If this crap keeps up, this may be what happens. Though to be honest, I have little faith that we will win this battle in the end. It's just unfortunate that we don't really have any options but to deal with Seattle Public Utilities. (Or do we? Anyone know if there's a competing service that provides water and trash services in Seattle?)